I thought Phuket was supposed to be this lovely little beach community where people went to relax and be peaceful. Don't ask me why I thought that, I'm sure it's just ignorance. It's a hell hole. But more on that later!

Before we arrived in Phuket, we spent a few days (including New Years Eve) in Phnom Penh, Cambodia. Phnom Pehn seems like a really really awesome place... if you're a 60 year old single white male and looking for a young girl to help you forget your loneliness. Most places we went seemed to have old dudes with young ladies awkwardly "enjoying" each other's company. Also, the Killing Fields are really fun. Oh no, wait... depressing.

One night we had Happy Pizza. It made me anxious. It wasn't much of a happy time. Another night we ate tarantulas.

Tarantulas, Yum!

Tarantulas, tastes like chicken.

Also, one time, I ate cockroaches. It wasn't till we got to Chiang Rai, but here's what it looked like:

They tasted like flowers smell

The aftermath.

On New Year's Eve we took it pretty easy. We started out at this sweet place called the Zeppelin Bar. They have this huge collection of 70's and 80's Rock and Heavy Metal on vinyl and just play that all night. The guy accepted my request for "The Trooper" by Iron Maiden. My friend Ronnie would have loved this place. Oh yeah, they had Canadian Club there too. After 4 of those we moved on to find somewhere that was doing a countdown. We ended up at a place in which we were the only white people. We got there just before the countdown and left promptly after. I got weirded out because I looked around after the clock struck 12:00 and everyone was looking at us. It was almost like a scene out of a movie. You know, where the camera does a 360 pan and everyone is staring into the lens? Yeah, just like that.

They were just giving them away

Okay, so then we went to Phuket. Now, before I trash Phuket any more (and I will), I have to say that we actually had a pretty good time there. The reason we were going in the first place was to meet up with Laura's parents and some of Laura's Norweigian family, who vacate there often. They were fun, the beaches were really nice (however, crowded), the water was crystal clear, and I got a badass tan (that has already mostly faded away). So, you know, it's not where you are or what you do, but who you're with that makes something worthwhile.

The Norweigian connection

So many beach umbrellas

If you ever want to experience open contempt for people other than Americans, Phuket is the place to go. Everyone there hates Russians. If you're talking to someone who isn't Russian, as soon as they find out you're also not Russian, they'll tell you they hate Russians. I found it funny because everyone was so comfortable just letting you know that they hated Russians. Every single Russian. Hate them. Usually when I tell people that I hate another race or culture, I at least try and sugar coat it with something like "I'm not racist but..." or "I don't want to stereotype but...". We only really got the "Russian" experience once. It was on this awful tour we took to Koh Phi Phi.

So, I know you're really not supposed to go on these package tours cause they're usually a rip-off and often don't turn out the way you expect, but we wanted to see Koh Phi Phi so we took a chance.

They picked us up at 7:30am. That sucks enough on it's own. After a 45 minute drive and a 45 minute wait, we were ready to go! Or at least, we would if one of the boat's engines wasn't broken. After another 45 minute wait (we're now 45 minutes behind schedule) we were off!! As we pulled away from the dock, they inform us the boat capacity is 45, but there are 3 extra people because of a booking error. The boat's capacity is officially 42 according to the sticker on the side, which still wouldn't have been comfortable. Also, it didn't help that there were at least 5 overweight Italians weighing down one side of the boat. Not 10 minutes into the trip we had to stop at some random island to fix the engine again. It only took them an hour. They had to bring in three new carburators and a mechanic. While they tried to fix the engine Laura's dad and Laura's second cousin once removed, Brage (we figured it out) discussed what the real problem was. When we finally got on the boat again the Russians literally yelled at the people who had moved into where they were sitting before.

Our first actual activity was snorkelling. There were at least 6 other tour boats in the bay- there were so many people it was more like swimming through a flabby armed spanking machine. This was followed by lunch which consisted of cramming our feed-holes with excrement from the guests at the 5 star resorts. Buffet Style. When we get back on the boat the Russians yelled at new people in their spots. This time with finger snaps! After colliding with a long tail boat near Koh Phi Phi Ley (no one was hurt) we made it to Maya bay, where they filmed the movie "The Beach". It was nice but we only had 30 minutes because we were so behind schedule. Actually, everyone was back on the boat in 30 minutes except for the Russians who showed up 20 minutes late, unapologetic.

The Beach beach

Approaching the Beach beach

Then it was on to Khai island where we were finally able to buy a much needed beer. It was the only highlight of the tour. When we boarded the boat yet again, there was a 5 foot radius around where the Russians were sitting. Brage, who was pretending to be Canadian, was eavesdropping on a family of Swedes who were trash talking everyone on the boat. Especially the Russians.

Then we ran our of gas.

We got back to the dock about an hour and a half late. After an hour in Phuket traffic, about 15 minutes from our hotel, our shuttle bus driver informs us that he has another pick-up to make at the airport and dumps us on the side of the road. He flags a tuk tuk to take us the rest of the way but only has enough for part of the fare, so we fork over the rest. I doubt he was reimbursed. I know we weren't.

Another gay sunset

Anyway, after Phuket, we moved on to Chiang Mai in the north of Thailand. We loved it in Chiang Mai. People are nice to you there even if they're not trying to sell you anything. The first few days we spent with Laura's parents. We saw a bunch of temples (there are about 300 in Chiang Mai), ate some good food, and did an elephant thing.

An Elephant

It's like a suction cup!

Elephant Trunk

Laura's parents left after a few days and but we stuck around in Chiang Mai. There are way more North Americans in Chaing Mai than in the South of Thailand, or anywhere else we've been for that matter. A few nights ago a dreadlocked hippie was playing music on a little speaker thing around his neck. I asked him "Is that Bassnectar?" and we were friends. His name is Jonesy- he wss with a group of about 12 people all from San Francisco. They reminded me of the kind of people we would meet at Shambhala. There's also a lot of hippie vegan fare in Chiang Mai. There is a restaurant called Blue Diamond that the raw-diet-organic-hipster-vegan folks back home would die for. We ate there as much as we could.

Everyone told me about how wonderful and smiling the Thai people are before we left for the trip. It wasn't until we got to the North of Thailand that I felt like I understood what they meant. When we were in the south islands, there were so many tourists and it felt like the locals were just there to run the resorts, restaurants and taxis. This resulted in what I felt was sometimes either bitter attitudes or superficial encounters. Thai people actually live in Chiang Mai so I felt less like a big dollar sign with arms and legs and a head.

After Chiang Mai it was on to Chiang Rai which is even farther north. Chiang Rai didn't really turn out to be what we expected... We thought it was going to be even more of a hippie haven than Chiang Mai, but it seems more of a transit town than anything. It seemed like tourists just come in for one or two nights before moving on to their next destination. We were going to do some trekking here, but it was a bit expensive so we went on a cycling tour of the country side instead- it was awesome. We finished at the White Temple which made coming here worthwhile 10 times over. It was so cool that it deserves it's own blog post so stay tuned...

Oh yeah, at this one temple in Chaing Mai there were monks praying. You could get super close to their faces and take pictures and they wouldn't flinch or break their concentration or anything. I only got four pictures off before another monk chased me out of the temple with a bo-staff.

Monks, close up, with a wide angle lens

Monks, close-up, with a wide angle lens 2

Monks, close-up, with a wide angle lens 3

Monks, close-up, with a wide angle lens 4

521 Responses to Never go to Phuket

use of sildenafil in heart disease

dapoxetine plus sildenafil india. effects of sildenafil citrate acetylcholine - sildenafil apotex 25 mg,


sildenafil 100 mg marham daru

where can i find sildenafil citrate. sildenafil tablets bp monograph - sildenafil tablet use in hindi,

how to take methotrexate and folic acid

health express co uk. how to take champix uk - how long after you quit smoking do you feel better,

short words for chatting

stages of nicotine withdrawal. champix.medinfoblog.com - why do you gain weight when you quit smoking cigarettes,

products with sildenafil citrate

cenforce 100 sildenafil citrate tablets. sildenafil.medinfoblog.com - sildenafil citrate tablets 100 mg,

quit smoking app reviews

withdrawal from cigarettes timeline. how often can i get champix - taking pills side effects,

max tylenol dose per day

cialis time to work. champix available south africa - i need to stop smoking,

sore throat and cancer

can you buy penicillin over the counter. free champix in ontario - tablets to quit smoking,

sildenafil tadalafil ve vardenafil

sildenafil citrate 20 mg tab. sildenafil.medinfoblog.com - sildenafil citrate manufacturers india,

help giving up smoking

smoking when you have a cold. champix.medinfoblog.com - chronic autoimmune urticaria treatment,

sildenafil citrate patent information

sildamax 100mg sildenafil citrate. sildenafil.medinfoblog.com - is there a generic sildenafil,

does weed make you skinny

quit smoking ad australia. champix per non fumare - how to quit smoking during early pregnancy,

sildenafil 100mg troche dosage

side effects of sildenafil citrate 50 mg. sildenafil 100mg marham daru - viagra sildenafil citrate tablet,

flyer for shoppers drug mart

manufacturer coupon for lyrica. champix.medinfoblog.com - throwing up after quitting smoking,

chewing gum addiction treatment

primolut n side effects in hindi. can you take duromine and champix together - can quitting smoking cause panic attacks,

dr reddy's sildenafil citrate

sildenafil tablets 100mg uk. erector 25 mg sildenafil - how to make sildenafil to work faster,

nice guidelines smoking cessation

how much does smoking cost the nhs. champix.medinfoblog.com - celexa patient assistance program,

panic attack quitting smoking

dangerous drug in the world. champix.medinfoblog.com - trillium drug program mailing address,

trillium drug program guide

how long it takes to stop smoking. day one of champix - shoppers drug mart protein bars,

cost of pre paid prescriptions

the boiler house dublin. champix.medinfoblog.com - best way stop smoking,

how to prevent smoking

cialis when to take. champix.medinfoblog.com - smoking with nicotine patch on,

chemist warehouse campsie trading hours

what happens to your body when you stop smoking. champix.medinfoblog.com - signs of nicotine addiction,

what is the safety net for pharmaceuticals

abbreviation text message list. champix to quit smoking - smoking with a cold,

reasons to quit smoking

does quitting smoking make you fat. stop champix side effects - is it normal to get sick after quitting smoking,

Rumah Walatra Herbal

this article is great for being an inspiration to write my thanks :)

Rumah Walatra Herbal

best smoking cessation drugs

can you take mucinex with nyquil. champix.medinfoblog.com - will quitting smoking make me gain weight,

physical effects of quitting smoking

allen carr's easyway to stop smoking book. champix.medinfoblog.com - side effects quit smoking cold turkey,

quit smoking benefits timeline skin

medications that cause diabetes insipidus. champix.medinfoblog.com - after effects of duromine,

short forms of messages

can quitting smoking make you constipated. champix.medinfoblog.com - meth use in the us,

quit smoking high blood pressure

ontario drug benefits formulary. champix.medinfoblog.com - quit smoking tablets india,

side effects of quitting nicotine cold turkey

causes of lung cancer. tips for quitting with champix - purchase duromine online australia,

can smoking lose weight

baltic princess nuuska valikoima. champix.medinfoblog.com - how long do phentermine side effects last,

cialis forum where to buy

list of hard drugs. weight gain while taking champix - department of human services md,

chest cold after quitting smoking

acupuncture for smoking cessation success rate. champix.medinfoblog.com - trillium drug program eligibility,

to go cold turkey

chemist warehouse morning after pill. coming off champix early - acupuncture for quitting smoking success rate,

where to get champions in wow

how to stop tobacco eating. champix.medinfoblog.com - if i quit smoking will i lose weight,

how to stop smoking without drugs

cialis once a day. champix.medinfoblog.com - nausea when quitting smoking,

stop smoking mouth spray

what are dangerous drugs. champix.medinfoblog.com - stop smoking health benefits,

is methotrexate a chemo drug

chemist warehouse cannon hill trading hours. champix side effects how long do they last - how long does heart palpitations last after you quit smoking,

long term side effects of duromine

history of champion league. champix initiation pack cmi - shoppers drug mart shampoo brands,

generic name for nexium

worst drug you can take. champix tablets south africa - ontario trillium health benefit,

wellbutrin mechanism of action

cravings after quitting smoking. champix.medinfoblog.com - online drug store in india,

cravings after quitting smoking

quit smoking timeline cravings. champix.medinfoblog.com - cold turkey quit smoking side effects,

drugs used for smoking cessation

can you fill a prescription out of state. champix will nausea go away - how much are prescriptions,

how to use duromine effectively

good price pharmacy booval. champix for stop smoking - smoking cessation diet plan,

can i take mucinex with robitussin

how long does it take for cialis to kick in. champix support program south africa - do i have to pay for prescriptions,

hair dye shoppers drug mart

buy penicillin without prescription. champix.medinfoblog.com - how long can you take duromine for,

affiliate marketing for beginners

cold turkey quit smoking timeline. champix.medinfoblog.com - side effects of chf,

does herbal viagra really work

age limit for taking viagra. edhelppric.mdhelpserv.com - generic viagra forum discussion,

Post new comment

The content of this field is kept private and will not be shown publicly.
  • Web page addresses and e-mail addresses turn into links automatically.
  • Allowed HTML tags: <a> <em> <strong> <cite> <code> <ul> <ol> <li> <dl> <dt> <dd>
  • Lines and paragraphs break automatically.
  • You may insert videos with [video:URL]

More information about formatting options

By submitting this form, you accept the Mollom privacy policy.